Early Intervention of another kind

In the last few weeks, the USA Gymnastics community has gone through a lot of turmoil. I would blog about the details although most of you following this post would not know anyone I post about so I will keep this quite general. I will say that several people I have known since I was quite young came forward about being sexually abused by the coaches that they trusted, looked up to and respected. Many people have been able to close a terrible chapter in their lives by exposing this and it has led to several coaches being fired and numerous investigations about the facts of these cases. I chose to write about this topic because although not directly related to my son, indirectly it is because I also respected some of these coaches and am still friends with some of the victims.

In this case, early intervention may have come in the form of one of these gymnasts parent's having been able to notice "something off", having the courage to ask their child about it and in turn giving that child the courage to say something many years ago. In any case, early intervention don't come soon enough and because of this it takes many, many years, if not forever to fix what took place.

I think about all of my years as a gymnast, the many ups and downs, the numerous conversations I tried to have with my parents about things I didn't like, wanted to change, was unhappy about etc. For some reason, maybe because they weren't living it, didn't see it my way and thought what I was doing was exactly what I wanted to be doing. They chose to ignore my unhappiness at times. I guess as I look back on it they may have thought I was just having a bad day and didn't mean what I was saying or feeling. The sad thing is that when I had those issues, if someone would have actually believed me, I know that things would have been a little easier for me during my childhood years. The years that help to mold you into the adult one becomes later in life. In a nutshell, the lack of early intervention that went on in my life growing up has led me to be the advocate I am for my son and the the person I am today.

The more that unfolds about the scandals that have taken place within the gymnastics community the more I realize we each had to deal with our own things from those years. I also realize that each of us walked away with very different memories, both good and bad. Some of us ended up walking away stronger and more corageous, find a way to intertwine it into our lives to be able to stand up for ourselves and fight for right and wrong and others were so beaten down by it that it has taken many, many years to get to a point where they can once again "love themselves" and trust others.

For me, all of the injuries, ups and downs and the never having a chance to compete for a chance at a spot on the 88 team took me about 6 years to get over. During that time I felt quite lost, knew what I didn't want to do with my life but had no idea what I wanted to do which put me in a state of limbo. Once again I found myself "against my parents" for the simple fact that they couldn't understand I was unable to put into words what I was feeling. During that time I had no words to describe it other than I felt "lost and without purpose" I knew that they wouldn't understand and the more I tried to talk to them the worse I felt about it all.

After completing college, taking on my first real job in a brand new state and finding myself in yet another "non healthy" relationship, I realized that I could either choose to make my life better or continue on this downward spiral. I decided to take the road less traveled. The one that helped me figure out a way to become a better, stronger, more determined person. A person that knows success comes with failure and learns from each obstacle along the way.

After all these years, I know that so many of those in my "gymnastics family" have helped me figure out what it is that I want out of life. They also taught me how to push through the pain, heartache and bad times. I now know that if you, keep your head up, take what is said to you with a grain of salt and stay focused on your goals - life will go on no matter the outcome.