Daily Forecast: Somewhere Between Sunny, Super Goofy and a Category 4 Hurricane

The daily forecast Somewhere Between Sunny, Super Goofy and a Category 4 Hurricane, fits with the diagnosis which helps us understand some of the behaviors, however that doesn't mean things will get easier, in fact now is when the really challenging work begins.  Why? In part because there is still so much we don't understand about ADHD in general let alone how to best help our youngest deal with it.  You may be asking yourself how that is possible given all the years we spent figuring out how to help our oldest with his ASD, SPD diagnosis and I am humble enough to tell you that I asked myself that very same question. How is it possible that I don't have the tools to guide, support and help my youngest work through the confusion in his mind?  

While outwardly there are many similar behaviors exhibited, what is triggering them is quite different.  You see when someone is high functioning on the spectrum ABA services are key in "retraining" the child's brain by removing the scratches from a CD Rom and replacing them with tools necessary to function "like a typical" child both socially and emotionally.  Now reality is that the social and emotional differences between someone on the spectrum and a "typically developing" child will never be the same. It is true that with the right amount early intervention many people may never know what life was like before the behaviors were "retrained" from what once overpowered and overwhelmed this child.  What is also true is that many people will look at you cross-eyed when you say your child can't stand in long lines, has trouble when plans change or can't calm themselves down without you hugging them so hard you think you may break some bones.  Unless you are in it you really can't comprehend it.  You can certainly empathize with or ignore the behaviors BUT Please DO NOT judge them for it.  The forecast for our oldest was once the same as this post title and has since moved to Mostly Sunny with a chance of sarcasm and an occasional tornado.  This kid, whose meltdowns would last upwards of 3 hours on any given day is now an overachieving straight A student with a sassy personality, great smile and a heart of gold. 

On the flip side - ADHD is like trying to remove scratches from a record so that when you put the needle on the track the music doesn't skip. Those of you old enough to know what a record is know that it is pretty much impossible to remove scratches from a record.  This my readers is why all of the tools, tricks and tips I received from my "village and dream team" over the years wasn't working as we tried to guide my little one back to the "middle"(a state of calmness).  The title of this post (Daily Forecast: somewhere between Sunny, Super Goofy and a Category 4 Hurricane) seemingly sums up what it is like living with our youngest son. Since we are an all or nothing type of family, it is not shocking to me that he has all 3 possible components (inattention, hyperactivity and Impulsivity).  As hard as it is for us, it must be that much harder for him.  It breaks my heart to think about what it is like to be in his own head with all his overlapping thoughts, inability to focus or think before he reacts or struggles to retain and recall information he just heard but didn’t really listen. At the same time, he is inquisitive, creative, always wanting to entertain, sometimes sneaky and always adorable.  

About a month ago he came up with the idea that every night before he goes to sleep we recite our happy thought for the day which I love.  Now I am sure it began as a way to "avoid" going to sleep yet I love it none the less.  One night a few days ago, he began asking me questions on a specific topic. After asking me his 10th question, something I had answered many times before, I reminded him that we already talked about it and kindly stated the answer. This isn’t something new for him (asking questions over and over) but what came next was different.  He looked at me, put his hand over his eyes and mouth, shook his head and said mommy why do I have so many questions?  It was as though something in his little mind realized it wasn't normal to ask so many questions over and over and over.  For a moment, I was joyful that he could realize this for himself, but that joy quickly turned to sadness and concern for all he must be going through internally that he can't articulate or control. 

We know that ADHD is a brain disorder that interferes with functioning or development, yet the million-dollar question remains: So where do we go from here to best help him?  For now, we continue to work with the IEP team, the teachers, support staff and psychologist to figure out the best protocol for our son. 

If you or anyone you know has a child struggling with ADHD, I would love to hear about your particular situation, what you tried and what worked and/or didn't work.

Miraculous Transformation - Bath Time Tears To Swim Team Triumph

Yesterday afternoon I took a stroll down memory lane by reading through the last 5 years of my early intervention blog posts and stumbled upon something I wrote back in 2012 about our oldest son's struggles with something called Sensory Processing Disorder.  

Flashes of those days that began 5+ years ago are still clearly visible in my mind. Just as visible in my mind is the amazing transformation that has taken place since then for my oldest.  From bath time tears to swim team triumph, his love of the water is far from those distant memories I wrote about in 2012. 

An excerpt from the post called Our Bath Time Journey  - written April 21, 2012

My earliest memories of my oldest in the “big boy” bath consisted of him screaming bloody murder, grabbing onto the sides of the door frame with all his might, me fighting back tears that many times came streaming down my face and then once we finally got into the tub, he would do everything in his power to get out. He would scream, try to hit, scratch etc. and try to crawl over the tub. It didn’t matter what we did…a little water, a lot of water, bath toys, and bubbles….he still wanted out. After months of barely getting him into the tub he finally became comfortable enough to stand in the tub, just long enough for me to wash his hair and body off without screaming. As long as he was in and out in less than 1 minute we were ok.

Surprisingly or perhaps purposefully the memories of the above times are not present in his memory.  You may be wondering why I would make that statement, well let me tell you.  Our almost 11 year old has a memory like a Dolphin which means he may not see someone or something for years, yet when we come across that place or that person the memories come back.  Part of me has to wonder if he "blocked out" those times because they were too painful, too frustrating or just too tough for him to handle.  At times I am envious of my son and even husband because they don't vividly recall those times like I do.  Then again it is those times that now bring a huge smile to my face, pride to my heart and joy to my soul.  If we hadn't gone through what we did, gotten the support from our "villagers and dream team" who knows where any of us would be today.  Thankfully we don't have to know what that reality would be like and instead can look back knowing that all of the blood, sweat and tears have led us here where I am able to write about it, talk about it and be proud of the accomplishments.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think we would make this Miraculous Transformation from bath time tears to swim team triumph.  I bet some of you are wondering why I said We and not he, aren't you? 

Here's why - From day one it was a team effort.  It wasn’t up to my son to change on his own, not up to the behavioralists, the psychologist, the OT, myself, my husband nor the educators alone to "fix" him.  It literally takes a Village. 

An excerpt from a post I called It Takes a Village - written September 12, 2011

If not for the team behind me, I am not sure where we would be today. If not for the team along side of me now, I think I would be quite depressed and at a loss for what to do next. I am not sad, nor depressed nor feeling alone any longer. Instead, I am in a great place, feeling extremely optimistic about the future and the wonderful life ahead for our family and our kids. 

Ironically the very thing that triggered the complete fear of a bath tub filled with only 2 inches of water, eventually became the thing that led him to love swimming. A fear of drowning turned into a feeling of complete freedom just before age 5. Water became his friend as he took private lessons in our pool and learned to swim from the steps to the wall(short length).  Eventually gaining the courage to swim the full length of the pool, his swim coach tried her best to get him to breathe as he swam from end to end.  Much to her dismay, he did just the opposite; not because he was being defiant, just because he like the way he felt when swimming end to end under the water. We would watch as he stood at the shallow end of the pool, dove down deep into the water and would glide from end to end without taking a breath until he reached the far side of the pool; emerging out of the water with a smile of pure delight all over his face.

Swimming went from something we wanted him to learn to something he enjoyed and eventually the sport he wanted to master going so far as setting a goal to make swim team.  Over the next several years he took lessons weekly and even tried out for a swim team only to be told he was too good for the junior swim team, but couldn't make the main swim team because he didn't have his flip turn.   Given his determination and expectation to make it, this could have crushed him, but instead he got back in the pool and worked toward mastering the flip turn.  After weeks of private lessons with a lot of time focused on the flip turns, the forward motion continuing to make him dizzy and unable to complete the move he had a decision to make.  He could keep taking lessons OR he could join a different swim team that didn't require a 10 year old to do a flip turn.  He chose option 2 and what a great decision it was for him.  The team he chose had friends from school and the neighborhood and coaches that were fantastic, having just the right mix of encouragement and expectations.  His drive led him to attend every morning or evening practice, sometimes both in one day in order to improve his strokes and speed.  Did it pay off?  Sure did!  Every meet led to a new "best time" for whichever strokes he swam (mostly free and fly), heat winners, more ribbons than he has ever seen and to top it  off, the coach chose him to award with the medal for most improved swimmer in his age group. 

Summer swim season may be over, but his journey toward greatness doesn't stop here for this kid.  After a lot of anxiety filled conversations along with some pep talks, he decided to try out for year round swim and made the team!   He is dedicated to becoming the best swimmer he can be and knows that it won't come easy, yet he is willing to commit and work hard at it.  In my eyes he is the epitome of what courage and determination is all about. 

It took a village to get us here and it will take a village to keep us going, but rest assured we will keep forging ahead, moving mountains, adding to our village and learning from every new situation we encounter along the way.   

I encourage you to share this post with those who may be able to relate and/or benefit from our journey. 

Journey toward a diagnosis

We never thought we would need to embark on yet another Journey toward a diagnosis.  The journey for our oldest took almost 2 years, a lot of specialists, persistence and patience.  Fast forward a few years and here comes Journey toward a diagnosis take 2.  

Our youngest was a happy go lucky, silly, always smiling, sometimes mischievous, little ray of sunshine. When I first had a gut feeling that he may have ADHD I was completely perplexed; asking myself how could this happen and why did it happen?  Those who know me, know that I don't run from asking for help to ensure my children are happy, taken care of and in a productive, safe learning environment, so why hadn't I yet asked for him to be tested for ADHD?  Well a few reasons: First, from what I had read he was too young to be tested b/c when I first had concerns he was only 5 and too young for an accurate diagnosis.  Second, I was hoping that the early intervention and IEP goals we put in place (small group settings, pull out for reading, extra time when needed etc.) would do the trick.  You may be thinking, what happened next, so let me tell you.

Kindergarten came and went and I continued to have concerns because despite all of the IEP services we had been granted and/or fought for, we weren't seeing much of a difference in the way he was learning, retaining and engaging. Given the fact that we had been down this road before with our oldest for Autism Spectrum Disorder among other things; we weren't newcomers to this world.   We know first hand the positive impact of early intervention, appropriate IEP goals, educators and the relationships that brings it all together to a successful outcome. 

Our little one went to summer school, where he didn’t learn much however it wasn't a complete loss as I learned something from one of the teachers that proved helpful, at least for Kindergarten.  Toward the end of the school year I had read an article about a classroom in a Howard County school who had all kids, those with delays and those excelling in school on the balls and EVERYONE performed better.  Being a person who is willing to try alternative/new programs, I asked if the ESY host school happened to have a stability ball. The teacher looked in the classroom closet and we were in luck.  Not only did they have a ball and base, it fit our little guys height.  Throughout the summer, when they placed him on this  stability ball seat, the teacher noticed that he had a tendency to focus better.  Hmm, perhaps we are onto something here!?!

We began first grade hopeful of happy year for him and significant progress toward his IEP goals.  While there were some bright spots, as he made his way through first grade he seemed to consistently struggle.  In class it was mostly staying focused, retention of information learned and sometimes appearing inattentive.  At home, in addition to all of that playing a part, we witnessed impulsive behaviors in a way that made my jaw drop to the floor and my heart beat out of my chest.  While I won’t go into any detail today about those events, I will say it put me on very high alert. 

We knew the setbacks and/or lack of progress at school weren't due to the way his teacher taught, what she observed and how she engaged with him because our older son had her a few years prior.  Furthermore, based on the partnership we have with this teacher, we knew he was receiving every bit of additional support possible under the guidelines/rules of school administration.  By process of elimination, this led us to complete frustration with his case manager.  Rest assured we tried and tried (for over 2 years in fact) to give this person the benefit of the doubt and unfortunately what was being relayed to us (which wasn't much) didn't align with the limited progress and at times regression shown on his school work, progress reports and report cards.  Unless an additional support person was guiding him there was little to no progress made and in some cases, what appeared to be regression.  

When I first brought up the possibility of ADHD with the school psychologist, she stated that she wasn't sure based on her observations, however was willing to go with my theory and talk to his teacher and the case manager.   About a week later the psychologist called me back and said the teacher didn't have enough information to go on to provide a professional opinion while the case manager basically dismissed the idea.  I went on to adamantly express my concern that this case manager was not looking at the big picture.  So now what? Were we at a dead end?  Never say there is a dead end when it comes to helping guide, support and lead your children.  What did I do; the only thing I knew how, continued the conversation advocating for my child.  I asked the school psychologist if she had reviewed the IEP in detail, paying close attention to all of the goals.  The answer was no, but hold on let me pull it.  Together we began to review his full IEP program and based on the scope and depth of his goals revealed she came to the conclusion that I was very likely onto something.  She went onto explained that without seeing just how many different tools and goals we had in place to help him focus, retain, keep him focused she couldn't have seen what I was expressing as a potential trigger.  One can only imagine my mix of emotions - thrilled that the school psychologist was willing to dig deeper to help my child and the complete disappointment, anger and frustration with the case manager that after working along side him for 2 years, didn't connect the dots or even consider this a possibility!  This realization gave me the motivation needed to go back to the school, request immediate changes to the support he was getting from his case manager and seek further testing to find out what was triggering the behaviors and inability to retain and move toward his goals as we would have expected.

And so the long wait began for us and a lot of testing for our 6 year old first grader.  After several months of testing, compiling reports and creating a summary of the results we were ready to meet again with the entire IEP team.

Diagnosis: ADHD - all 3 possible components (Inattention, Hyperactivity and Impulsivity)

Where do we go from here with a Daily Forecast somewhere between Sunny and a Category 4 Hurricane....

Moving Mountains

As my 45th birthday approaches, I do as I have always done leading up to a milestone birthday. I reflect on what has transpired since the last milestone birthday, think about the successes, failures, things I would do differently etc. This year I find myself thinking mostly about my never ending journey to move mountains for my two boys in hopes of providing them with the best possible school experience(academic and socially) while focused on their mental and physical well-being.

In a curious moment, I searched Google for the meaning of moving mountains only to find everything from a hit song to a vacation home and even a marketing company which told me that moving mountains can mean whatever you or I perceive it to mean. For me, moving mountains is about conquering the unknown, overcoming the obstacles set in front of you, finding a way to go over it, through it, around it; whatever it takes to keep you on the path you were meant to take. I am not saying that we are predestined for all of the events in our lives to take place(my 10 year old would argue otherwise) just that we all have some sort of mountain to move; the outcome stemming from how one decides to go about it. Some will sit and stare at the mountain, wallowing in their sorrows along with a whoa is me attitude, some will try and chisel their way through the mountain one hit at a time, some may avoid it all together and run away from what stands in their way, some may look for a way around it or over it and maybe just maybe some will let down their guard and be vulnerable enough to ask for help.

This simple 4 letter word - HELP - is hard for so many people to say yet it is exactly how I began the journey toward successfully moving my first mountain. I feel it is important to note that for most of my life, the word HELP was not part of my vocabulary. I am not sure if I was too stubborn or too proud to ask or if I just thought I could figure it out on my own. Regardless of what stopped me from asking, my children gave me the courage, strength and desire to put up the white flag and ask for help. What began as my very own little dream team of special educators, support services, psychologists and behavioralists 9 years ago has turned into an ever growing support system that could populate a small village.

Over the last 5 years I found myself saying I am a "tiger mom" yet after reading the "definition" of Tiger mom, I have come to realize that this term couldn't be farther from the truth. The truth is, I am a supportive mom Advocate who encourages my children to try new things, to fail at times because without failure we can't learn. I also tactfully partner and collaborate with the educators and subject matter experts at the school and otherwise. Why; because that trusted and mutually respectful partnership allows me to successfully fight and obtain the programs and accommodations needed for each of my boys to be successful. What makes me so sure this approach works? To start, both boys have received some type of services since they were under 3 years old. It continues to take a lot of research and persistence on my part to stay on top of the every changing needs of the boys as they learn, grow and change with each passing quarter. Once I am armed with the appropriate facts, I approach the powers that be and request a meeting. Those meetings, both formal and informal, have led to life long friendships and mentors for me, beautiful relationships for my boys and their educators/coaches and support staff as well as growth and success I never thought possible, especially for my soon to be 5th grader.

I am pretty sure I lost count of just how many mountains have been moved, demolished, shaved down, walked around, into and over. Even with all of the "wins" I know that I am far from being able to stand side by side with all of my fellow villagers at the peak of the mountain, hands clasped together and held high screaming the words WE DID IT! This may sound glass half empty to some of you, but the truth of the matter is, the journey of moving mountains for my boys may never end so I take each small win as it comes and use it as motivation to continue advocating for my boys knowing that the journey is far from complete.

I can only imagine what I would have told someone who asked me 10 or 15 years ago what I thought my life would be like today; one thing I am certain of is that it wasn't filled with conquering mountain range after mountain range for my kiddos as has become my reality. At the same time, the love I have for these boys is like nothing I have ever experienced and would never ask to change the events that led me to the family my husband and I have made together! These boys are our pride and joy, the happiest of times, the saddest of times and our proudest of times.

After an enjoyable evening of wine, cheese and conversation with a dear and trusted friend of mine she said, "It's your chance to do what you are inspired by…I know you can do it :)"

My children are what inspire me most and nothing would be more rewarding than paying it forward to those who weren't lucky enough to happen upon the people I did all those years ago, guiding me toward what has now become my "new normal".

Maybe, just maybe it is my destiny to help others understand that when you let your guard down and surround yourself with the right support team, arm yourself with the appropriate knowledge and are willing to gracefully fight for what you know in your gut is right, they too can move mountains.

Perfect imperfections

"There is no need to be perfect to inspire others.  Let people get inspired by how you deal with your imperfections."  I have no idea who originally wrote this and I don't plan to steal it, however I will borrow it - and not just for today, but for life.  It resinated with me and honestly inspired me - opening my eyes to what is real vs what is fantasy.  Perception is reality, so why not make your reality one that doesn't frustrate you, but instead inspires others to learn from you, grow from what you have been through and help them see that their imperfections are perfect for them - leading to the ultimately reality that everyone has struggles and it is what we choose to do about them that makes us who we are and who we ultimately become as a human being.  I could sit here and type words that are full of woo is me's and they should have done this better or that better or gotten out of their situation, however that is not who I am nor how I have gone through life thus far.  

After reading that saying above, I immediately re-posted stating that I will make this my new motto. I mean why not - embrace my life, my struggles, my imperfections, all of the ups and downs, fights, laughter, love, friends who have come into my life for a short period and and those who stuck with me thorugh it all.  We all have a story, no one is perfect, but we can all be perfectly imperfect.  

My story begins at a very young age and too much to tell in this post.  So i think for this one I will just write some things about being imperfect. There is the imperfect that you feel internally and then there is what others think of you.  

For me, the internal imperfection began as early as I can remember.  No matter what I did, it wasn't what others were doing - I wasn't as pretty, as fast as popular and there was no way anyone else was feeling or going through what I was - at least that is what I would tell myself.  Even at 3 years old and in nursery school I remember watching others play with one another as I sat back, anxious and unsure of how to make friends and wondering, if I did walk up to the other kids, would they really want to play with me.  This same anxiety and uncomfortable insecurity within me is there haunting me still - 40 years later. 

For me, it took 38 years to come to terms with some of my ever haunting imperfections, only breaking free from some of the voices in my head, the past and the pressures I was putting on myself, after someone I trusted with my darkest internal imperfections said some impactful words that resinated.   This person  gave me the courage to do what I needed to do to begin feeling ok with me.  

During a very pivotal time in my life, I brought this person into the deepest, darkest part of my world.  I asked them to faciliate a phone conversation between me and 2 others with whom I was trying to mend a broken relationship.  A relationship I was hoping was worth mending and those on the other end, would finally sit back and listen to my true feelings and try and understand why I felt the way I did and why brushing things under the rug for most of our lives didn't mean the hurt, the guilt, the incidents would go away.  

Unfortunately what I had hoped would come of the conversation did not - instead of mending a broken relationship we chose to become more of acquaintances. It broke my heart but also gave me peace of mind.  Peace of mind, because I knew I had given it everything I had and the others chose not to try - It would take hard work and stir up a  lot of old/hurtful memories that neither were willing to take any responsibility for being a part of - in fact they felt as though the call was a personal attack on them and began throwing accusations that just weren't relevant to this situation.  When I began to respond, PS(the facilitator) said, stop, don't say anything. Unless they are willing to admit they are part of the problem there is nothing more to say.  

When she asked them if they were willing to go through this healing process, no matter how painful, they said no.  They openly admited that they didn't want to relive the past and would rather have a surfact relationship than one that was truly meaningful and full of respect and love.  That broke my heart.  When we hung up the phone, the facilitator and I began to regroup on what had just happened.  I was in a bit of shock from it all, not sure why since it was how I had llived most of my life with this set of people, but nonetheless, me being me, thought there was a chance that they would try.  PS(facilitator) said to me, I am sorry to tell you this but from what I heard in just one short hour, I believe you really down played the extent of the situation a great deal.  The reality seems to be much worse and much more broken than the picture you painted for me.  She went onto say that it was up to me to choose how I wish to deal with my life moving forward.  She told me that only I can control my destiny, but I had to be humble enough, brave enough and willing to take a chance and ultimately make a choice to keep or break off relationships that are toxic to me being ok and be ok with my perfect imperfections.  

I had never thought of it this way and immediately began to see things a little clearer.  It was like the sun was breaking through the clouds and clearing away the fog that had clouded my mind, my perceptions and my words for most of my life.  I felt empowered for the first time to put my feelings, my happiness, my family and most importantly me and my life first.  You have to understand something - my entire life I have been a person by nature who is inclined to help others, always see the best in people(even in their worst moments), give my all to every situations and put myself last - so what she was recommending was a brand new way of thinking for me.  Don't get me wrong, I still have battles that I fight daily, but from that day forward each battle has become a little easier to deal with and I realized that I am not alone in how I feel, what I have been through or even in my thinking of where I may be headed.  That conversation took place over 2 years ago.  

Fast forward two years - recently a colleague said to me, "If you could only see yourself the way others do, you would realize just how amazing you are - you don't give yourself enough credit". I thanked him and once again found myself reflecting my my inner demons, ultimately realizing, I still have a lot of work to do to really be ok with me.  

Thanks on Thanksgiving

This note was written to a group of individuals that without their help, I don't know where my son or our family would be today. Their professional guidance, unconditional and unwavering support guided us through so very tough times. I thought it was worth sharing. ====================== I often think of each of you and how much you impacted our lives; especially our oldest son's over 3 of his first 5 years alive. I can't even imagine where he would be today if it hadn't been for the guidance and support of everyone on this email. Your early intervention saved his childhood, our family and likely my marriage. We learned so much with and from all of you and for that I am grateful every day. My oldest, now in 2nd grade, is reading above grade level, on grade level for math and while he still has an IEP, for social, processing delay and comprehension, to an outsider, he fits right in with the crowd. In fact, he fits in so well that when I make reference to how he used to be/act or get a huge smile when I see him self regulate, compromise or help a friend - most of my current friends question my enthusiasm and excitement. Those of you on this email hold a very special place in my heart and I will never forget how much you guided us through so extremely tough times. When times get tough, your names still come up in conversation with "what would they tell us to do" type questions. I am not sure if any of you will ever know how much you mean to us. Now, my oldest son and I are paying it forward; me through my blog and conversations with those who just don't know how to ask for help and J with his kind heart and friendship to those that really need one. We all know that he was always empathetic. Now that he has matured, is processing things quicker and is just comfortable in his how skin, he is using all of the tools and techniques each of you helped him learn - and is helping others that can't necessarily help themselves. I couldn't be more proud of the big kid he is becoming and have all of you to thank for your part in it! I know I am missing a few names on this email, but unfortunately I don't have others emails. Please feel free to pass this along to other school teachers; all of whom were also a big part of this path. If I missed anyone else, feel free to share this message. I hope all of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. With Love and Gratitude

Paying it Forward

Two months ago I received the below email from someone who reached out to me for guidance, support or maybe just the final push she needed to figure out that No One will fight for your child the way you will...the note has been edited for confidentiality of course April 2013……..“Lisa, I just wanted to thank you for referring us to Dr. S. We had our first meeting with her yesterday and she was fantastic as advertised. We are going to have our son start seeing her regularly, and the school district also agreed to start providing counseling for him in the fall. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and giving me the push to do something!................Best, A” Knowing that I was able to help a mom advocate for her child makes me so happy. She took the change and went from regular mom to “tiger mom” “advocate mom” or whatever you choose to call her – taking the road less traveled, yet the road that led me to share my story through my blog. Although I haven’t posted in over 10 months, life continues to bring us twist and turns. Sometimes we hit road blocks, sometimes dead ends and through it all we keep knocking down walls and overcoming obstacles to get to where we want to go and lead us closer to the best person we can be. I now have 2 amazing boys with IEP’s for different reasons and both are improving daily. They are happy, healthy and surrounded by an army of educators that adore them and want nothing more than to see them succeed. My oldest received his Kindergarten report card today – exceeding expectations in all areas related to reading and in some areas related to math. Overall, reading, writing and doing math well above the Kindergarten expected levels. He is down to 2 main goal areas on his IEP (reading comprehension and social skills as they relate to the use of language). Those of you who began this journey with me almost 4 years ago know how far he has come. I thank each and every one of you for the part you played in giving him the tools to be where he is today! I must say that surrounding yourself with the wrong “experts” can have a detrimental effect on your child’s progress. I encourage anyone reading this post (for themselves or someone you know) to do your homework and make sure that you find the right experts for your family situation. When we moved back to MD, we made the mistake of taking an ABA company’s word for how they ran program and by the time I realized that what they said they would do was quite different than what was actually being done my oldest had regained old negative behaviors. Our family, nanny and his teachers spent the last 3 months re-teaching him and reinforcing the appropriate actions and reactions to situations instead of moving him forward. Learn from our mistake – take your time, do your research, check references and be involved. If you don’t know what to look for ask someone that may know. Feel free to reach out to me with questions as well. I welcome the opportunity to help people through their journey. Onto my youngest – He is now in pre-school and with his own IEP beginning this fall. Areas of focus are articulation, use of language and fine motor skills. He is currently making progress working with educators in the infants and toddlers program. Each day I see marked improvements and am once again very lucky to be surrounded by an army of experts wanting nothing but the best for him. Advocate for your child because if you don’t No One will! This post and my entire journey is proof positive that aligned with the right experts/educators, early intervention works!